February 7th, 2007

Loz Cola


So, it turns out I don't have a job after all.

My trial day went fine, but apparently other people applied after the date, and she wants to see them before giving me a more permanent position. She'll put me on the books and "contact me if anything comes up". This is in complete opposition to what she was saying last week - where she made it seem like I was the one.

I'm pretty fucking pissed off right now, because I feel like I've been fucked over, but hey. What the hell. It happens. Tomorrow I start the wonderful task of going to schools and giving them my Authority to Teach letter and if I'm lucky I'll eventually one day get asked to do a day of relief/substitute teaching.

This? This feeling of rejection? This is why I let myself be a shut-in.

The kids liked me, at least. Wherever I go, I get kids to like me. Good sign.

I hate the world right now. I'm going to crawl into my hole in the wall and cry.