June 8th, 2006

Loz Cola

To the boy under the cupboard, with love...

You know, sometimes giving up is the right thing to do. There's this large negative connotation attached to the words 'give up', but this isn't always the one intended. If you're doing something destructive, either physically or mentally, it's probably best to give up. If you're holding onto something for the sake of holding onto it, it's probably best to give up.

I choose to give up, but thank you for your inspiring comments. It was nothing to do with school, if that's what you were wondering.

And now, a confession. Why I stopped liking Harry Potter, by me, Loz. Or rather; Why I stopped raving on about Harry Potter or being interested in other people's opinions on said subject, even though I hold nothing against the boy or the series itself, by me, Loz.

I overloaded myself, I think. I used to spend hours reading threads at CoS, even if I didn't participate in them. I'd read them and take in what they were saying. I'd analyse theories. I'd muse over speculations. I'd absorb characterisation perceptions.

And I came to a personal conclusion; at least 95% of Harry Potter fandom is comprised of people vastly different from myself. People who harbour interpretations vastly different from my own. The crux? (The horcrux?); I simply couldn't be bothered arguing the case any more - either by typing it down or just shaking my head in bewilderment. I've never been one who liked the feeling of pain.

I also got sick of the people who complain about the fact that 95% of Harry Potter fandom is comprised of people vastly different from themselves. Okay, so I get it, your thoughts and theories rock and everyone else is a total nutjob. There's this culture of fear and derision surrounding the fandom. People hate the hatred inside it. People hate the kink or the supercilious nature of the fans, or the cracked out theories. People hate the cliques or the emptiness of so many souls and the feeling that their voice isn't being heard.

I stepped away and I feel fantastic. I have a lot of fond nostalgia, of course. I did spend a ridiculous amount of time doing Harry Potter related things, after all. The 5% who hold the same opinion as me on any HP subject are people I still engage with a lot, even if it's not about Harry Potter. I enjoy the occasional Harry Potter conversation with the odd person.

Somehow, this experience with the fandom has made me completely want to ignore the books and films. I don't even own Goblet of Fire on DVD. It appears there is life after Harry Potter obsession, and it's not all that bad.

In short; Mmmm, Harry. I'll pretend you're mine and mine alone.