May 24th, 2004

Loz Cola

The socio-ecological implications of sending the dog which was wearing my favourite shoe into space

1. The sky gets littered once more with a useless satellite, sure to eventually crash into the earth or float off further poluting outer space.

2. Being a dog, it doesn't quite know where its waste should go, and it amasses to immense proportions before NASA send personnel to clear it. Unfortunately this person is a dolt and just flings it into space. It becomes another orbital mass which causes a pretty light display, and creates mass confusion that the anti-christ is coming in Southern America.

3. People start to get extraordinarily jealous that a dog gets sent into space and they don't. They riot in Japan, Australia and Russia.

4. Without my favourite shoe, which coincidentally happens to be an integral part of my only pair, I am forced into homelessness. I can't get a job because I don't have a shoe, and I can't get another shoe because I haven't any money (and besides, it's my favourite). Instead I become a bum, and start haranguing the idealistic young teens which go near my underpass.

5. The dog meets some friendly extra terrestrials and learns to communicate. Soon canine and alien are set to wage war against the planet which enslaves one of its most intelligent species.

(n.b - whilst not quite what required of me, I thought I would have fun. I'd actually neglected to see the "cyber" part of space...)
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    curious curious
Loz Cola

Harry Potter and the Hogwarts... music for the new age...

Well, I just got back from the Harry Potter and the Hogwarts concert. If you thought, after already eclipsing the book, film and merchandise industries Harry Potter couldn't claim any more victims - along came this amazing musical phenomenon.

The music is a mixture of techno beats, the xylophone and jazz organ, which to be quite honest, is odd and somewhat grates on your ears. I suppose it's an effort to be different whilst still retaining that 'pop' sound. The lead singer is fantastic, though, I have to admit I never thought anyone could sing quite so high and then low in quick sucession. Mostly people seem to enjoy the music, though, and reviews have been exceptional.

The most scary thing about Harry Potter and the Hogwarts is that they're an official band, recognised by Warner Brothers and Jo Rowling. They're also immensely successful. It was a full house when I went, and their record has already sold over 20 million copies world wide. Considering their album has been out three days, this is rather worrying. The group seems set to dethrone The Beatles from their place as most wildly acclaimed group.

So, it seems, Harry Potter is taking over the world.